tammy kingery

[orange popsicle]

I feel so badly when I read about stories like this one. Or any missing person's story really. But especially ones that could quite possibly include the struggles of depression.

Tammy Kingery was obviously going through depression and doing battle with its symptoms:
1. She was sometimes having trouble being at her work I think. Or maybe even calling in sick a few times shortly before her disappearance (?) And according to her family, she loved her job at the nursing home. And loved being able to help her patients. She was a very caring and dedicated nurse, according to her sister and mom.
2. I think that also she was having some difficulties at home as well. Not sure to what extent. There are so many exciting, memorable, and special moments that come with being a mom. But in addition there can also be various challenges.
3. Depression can infiltrate the family and marriage. It may leave the non-depressed partner at a loss to know how to help the other one. The depressed spouse might not be in a conditon to be able to help him/herself. The whole situation can be maddening and frustrating, for both parents and for their children.
4. I haven't conducted any formal research, but I suspect that many depressed people are not necessarily good communicators of their symptoms and struggles. They are probably not too vocal at asking for help. The depression struggles to articulate clearly.

I might think of some other points to add to this topic. If so, I'll go ahead and post.

[magenta]

I'm glad that this category was started here. I also have read about the Tammy Kingery disappearance (& many many other stories), and the heartbreak that her family has had to go through afterward.

It seems that she didn't receive the help that she needed with her depression. Depressed people tend to isolate themselves, even though that isolation obviously can create complications:
1. Being alone doesn't help with the depression/symptoms
2. When one is apart from family/friends/people in general, the depression can become sharper
3. It's difficult for a depressed person to ask for help
4. Sometimes the depression wants to hide (like what...maybe pretend that it's not there - too painful perhaps)
5. Comment about meds: it can be quite challenging to find an effective medication + a workable dosage (so so frustrating for the people who are suffering...as well as for their families)
6. There are many many helpful and sympathetic medical professionals who treat depression (whether by psychotherapy, meds, or a combination of both), but as with anything else in this imperfect world, some are either not as effective in their treatment &/or not compassionate
7. #'s 5 & 6 experienced in combination can intensify the depressed person's feelings of being let down by others (their anger level, even) - they're just frustrated - like why isn't anything helping - I hate feeling like this, it sucks

#7 might sound overly dramatic, but it does happen & tends to make the whole situation worse.

[pink pearl]

This particular missing person story about Tammy Kingery is so distressing. She must have really been suffering.

When a person struggles with enjoying and appreciating the things that usually excite them and used to bring them joy, ...well that just completely changes their outlook and state of mind.

I realize that if you're reading this and you've never experienced depression first-hand, the thought of having to work at doing "previously-happy activities" probably seems crazy.

When you're this depressed, it's so hard to care.

[purple heart]

It seems to me that the story of Tammy Kingery is about not only the internal struggles of Tammy, but also about the mental torture of her family & friends after she disappeared. I cannot imagine what that is like, having someone in your life one moment...and then they're just gone. No answers.

It sounds as if she was being tormented by her depression. Since she never returned from her walk (or wherever she went), it seems that the sadness felt like it was too much for her to bear.

I think too, a severely depressed individual will take risks and perhaps carelessly place him/herself in harm's way. Not bother to be as cautious as when feeling their normal self.

[orange popsicle]

I have read over news articles and watched the "Disappeared" episode on the Tammy Kingery disappearance many times.

It stands out to me that in addition to possibly reacting from her prescribed medication (or from withdrawal symptoms ?), she was also feeling nervous and upset from the depression itself. That might be why she left her home to take a walk in the first place. (maybe ?)

When you're in that state of mind, you are definitely more vulnerable...to falling down and injuring yourself, to harming yourself on purpose, to being abducted, to losing your sense of direction and possibly getting lost and disorientated, etc. It is a very desperate place, psychologically.